Who You Think I Am Is Who I Become

🌟Weekly Inspiration🌟

My young adult group was so profound this past week ❤️. We were discussing when they’ve observed mothers yelling at their children in public and how upsetting that is. They noticed that often kids are yelled at for being kids, they aren’t even doing anything wrong or unsafe. They imagined how a public display of yelling is probably far less than how that parent may yell at their child in the home environment. Some reflected on what it was like for them when a parent yelled or called them names while growing up. They shared how much they all want to please their parents and how it feels when they miss the mark (as we all do sometimes). One astutely said about the yelling growing up, “Who you think I am is who I become.”

Kids believe what we tell them about themselves. We are the primary adults in their lives, they are supposed to trust us, why would they not believe what we say about who they are? Parents have tremendous power in a child’s life. Parents have tremendous power in an adolescent or young adult’s life as well. How we think of our children and the words we use to describe them really matter. I cannot underscore this enough. Kids make mistakes…everyone lacks character in moments…sometimes we are angry, frustrated, or scared as parents. I would just caution you to cool down before saying something that you might regret later. Sometimes you can’t undo damage inflicted by words. Sometimes those words become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Ask Yourself:

What triggers me as a parent?
Have I ever said something about my child, to my child, that I regret?
Did I attempt to make amends? Is it too late? Is it ever too late?
Did my parents yell at me or call me names? Did it impact my self-concept or life path?
Do my children want me to love who they are?
How can I take a beat before responding when I am flooded by big emotion?

Be well.