Butterflies

🌟Weekly Inspiration🌟

"How does one become a butterfly? They have to want to learn to fly so much that you are willing to give up being a caterpillar."  -HOPE FOR THE FLOWERS by Trina Paulus

Every spring when my kids were little, we would have a butterfly garden. We’d order caterpillars, watch as they turned into chrysalis, and then release them when they became butterflies. I haven’t done it for a few years now, as our youngest is in 9th grade and I’d thought that the kids had outgrown the tradition. But, I recently found the butterfly garden container and he spotted it—and acted excited that we were doing this again. I was surprised and secretly thrilled.  

I also decided to get one for our office. We serve lots of young people and thought this could be fun…and the transformation that occurs with butterflies also occurs in the therapy space for people and we thought that would be a cool topic to explore with folks. We watched as the caterpillars grew and changed. It was exciting when five butterflies emerged from their chrysalis--and on what would have been my Grandmother’s 101st birthday! She was so dear to me and she loved butterflies 🦋. It was the day of my Young Adult Process Group; they are 18-25 years old. They are all trying to figure out their way, decide on paths, gain independence, and lean into dating and socializing. We went outside to release the butterflies together—it was anti-climatic, as none of the butterflies took off into the sky, even when we scooted and encouraged them. Eventually, we left the top open and allowed the butterflies to launch at their own pace. None took flight while we were watching. It got me thinking 💡. It reminded me of a favorite book (quoted above). Some of these young adults struggle with the same ambivalence and resistance at times-just like the butterflies. Perhaps they have to “want to learn to fly so much” that they are willing to give up being a child.

Ask Yourself

What comes up for me when I think of butterflies?
How can nature be a teacher for us?
Would my older children still be delighted by a tradition from their younger childhood?
What ambivalence and resistance do I see in my children about growing up?
What holds them back? Fear? Grief?  
How can I encourage and nudge them? When it is time for me to step back and let them unfold at their own pace?

Be well!